Saturday, May 3, 2014

Dear House,

3 years, 1 month, and 11 days. That is how long this little house on Neville Ct, at the end of a cul-de-sac, in Waldorf, Maryland belonged to me. As I sit reflecting tonight, over the house that is no longer my home, and yet houses so many of my dearest memories and yet also hardest days it is hard to say what I am feeling about finally selling it. There are parts of me that couldn't be happier (most parts of my honestly), parts of me that feel like I can finally breathe again and move onto the next step for us, but still in the same deep sigh of relief I find myself breathing in a nostalgia that I knew would be coming and am happily embracing in a letter to our house on Neville Ct. Our home for the last 3 years 1 month and 11 days.

First picture we ever took of the house on Feb 2, 2011 when we put in the contract on the house

Dear House,

As of today at 6pm you are no longer mine. To say that I'm happy that this day has come would be an understatement. It has been quite the adventure owning you, house. The last 3 years, 1 month, and 11 days have been nothing I could have dreamed up and yet everything I didn't know I needed. And so with that, even with the excitement I feel over being officially released from you and ready to move onto the next adventure in our life.... I am sad to no longer be able to walk through your halls and be reminded of the adventure that we've been on, but that's what pictures are for anyways aren't they? And memories too... because though we've walked through your doors for the last time, and given the keys to your doors to your new owners, I will never forget what you did for us sweet little house on the end of a small, quiet cul-de-sac, I will never forget the lessons that you taught us, and I will never, ever forget the days spent amongst your four walls.

So much more than just 4 walls and a roof.... I can't say that I have ever grown more mentally, physically, mentally, spiritually or emotionally or accomplished so many things in any other place!

It was amongst your walls that I learned about who I was. I discovered my strengths and passions, and I learned about my weaknesses and fears. It was inside your doors that I grew up. I walked in an unsure 21 year old and am leaving an almost 25 year old very sure of who I am and what I want out of life. I discovered my strengths and passions, and I learned about my weaknesses and fears. It was inside your doors that I grew up. I spent all 2 years within these walls studying and working hard to earn my college degree, volunteering my time and heart to a ministry that changed my life. It was in the 3 years that I spent here that I learned about the mom and wife that God desires me to be, and that I too desire to be.

It was behind these windows, shutters, doors, and walls that I watched my Kaylee learn how to walk and talk and grow into the intelligent, beautiful girl that she is. It was this home that I spent 9 months pregnant and chasing a toddler while my sweet Sierra Joy grew in my belly, and this house that I brought my sweetie pie home to. It was this home that Sierra has lived in every single second of her life, where she took her first bath, walked her first steps, and spoke her first words. It was here that I got to see my girls relationship develop from just siblings into best friends, and in turn where I had the pleasure of watching my girls form bonds and relationships with friends of their own too.

It was in this little house, tucked at the end of this quiet little street that Mike and I grew together as one. We grew up together here, right along next to our baby girls. We faced more pain and heart ache and stress behind these walls than we could have ever imagined, but it was through all these trials, emotionally, physically, and mentally that we grew together. It was because of what we learning in this house, and through this house, that we knew who we were and what we wanted. We learned about our hopes and dreams and desires for the future, and about our goals and plans both individually and together. We walked into the house still newly weds learning about one another and navigating life on rocky terms and we are leaving with a firm foundation that can't be rocked. It was under this roof that we learned it was us, and God, against the world. It was here that we learned how to truly be a team, how to communicate, how to rely on each other, when we needed to just be supported and when we needed to be challenged a little bit.... it was here that our marriage grew and a bond I could never have dreamed up here.

The last 3 years have had there fair share of ups and downs, but I will never forget the life that we built in this home. I will never forget the ground work that was set into place for the rest of our lives. I will never forget the nights I spent up rocking my babies, the hours spent tucked behind a desk writing and completing seemly endless papers and assignment that did eventually end, the time spent crying and learning under the ceiling that flooded over and over and over that first year, the many dark nights tucked into bed with my soul mate and partner in this life talking and dreaming about what was and was to come, the little hand print in the paint on the wall in the hallway, the first steps my girls took down that same hallway, the endless giggles from the yard of two blissfully content little girls running in the grass or playing in the water, the face Mike made when he popped his head out of the blue bathroom (our first paint project... it was scary haha), every single beautiful Christmas
decoration, or the day we brought a bouncy little baby girl home for the first time. I will never forget the nights spent with my face buried into the carpet crying out to Jesus for comfort and strength in the midst of our trials, the scary day that we thought Mike had a stroke and had to be rushed to the ER, the painful days of seemingly endless trial after trial, or the day that I discovered that I would owe over 40k after graduation even after going to 2 years of community college. Oh no you see house, I will never, ever forget the good or the bad memories that we have from the last 3 years, 1 month, and 11 days. And while this day felt like it may never come and now that it has I am so over the moon thankful that it has..... I will never take for granted the lessons that I learned while tucked inside your walls.

Thanks for the memories. Thanks for changing me. Thanks for molding me.

Love, Amanda
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